The Books We Abandon: What DNF Says About Us as Readers. Every reader has been there—excitedly picking up a book, expecting to be transported into a new world, only to find themselves disengaged, disinterested, or even frustrated. Eventually, the moment comes when we put the book down, telling ourselves we’ll return to it later. But deep down, we know we never will. That book becomes part of the ever-growing Did Not Finish (DNF) pile. But why do we abandon books, and what does it say about us as readers?
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The Emotional Weight of Abandoning a Book
For many, leaving a book unfinished feels like breaking a silent contract with the author. We might experience guilt, a sense of failure, or even an irrational belief that the book deserves another chance. But should we really feel bad? Reading should be a pleasure, not an obligation. The books we DNF can reveal our evolving tastes, personal boundaries, and even emotional states at the time.
1. Our Changing Tastes as Readers
One of the most common reasons for abandoning books is that our reading preferences shift over time. A genre we once loved may no longer spark the same excitement. Maybe we were once captivated by elaborate fantasy world-building, but now, we crave fast-paced thrillers or introspective literary fiction.
Even within a single year, our preferences can change. A book we abandoned five years ago might suddenly resonate with us today. This doesn’t mean the book was bad—it simply wasn’t right for us at the time.
Example: You loved young adult dystopian novels as a teenager, but now, they feel predictable and formulaic. Instead, you gravitate towards complex, character-driven narratives.
2. Mood and Mental Space Matter
Sometimes, the problem isn’t the book—it’s us. Our mental and emotional states play a significant role in how we engage with a story. A deeply philosophical novel may feel overwhelming during a stressful period, while a lighthearted romance might seem shallow when we’re craving something profound.
Books that demand too much from us—whether intellectually or emotionally—can become exhausting rather than enjoyable. Recognizing this is crucial in understanding why some books remain unfinished.
Example: You start reading a dense historical epic but find yourself struggling to keep up. You realize that your current mood calls for something lighter and more uplifting.
3. The “Life’s Too Short” Philosophy
With millions of books out there, why waste time on one that doesn’t hold your interest? Many seasoned readers adopt a DNF without guilt philosophy, acknowledging that forcing themselves through a book they don’t enjoy is not a badge of honor.
This mindset aligns with the growing awareness that reading should be enriching, not punishing. If we wouldn’t sit through a movie that bores us, why should books be any different?
Example: A highly-rated novel isn’t clicking for you, but rather than slogging through, you decide to move on to a book that excites you.
4. Our Boundaries and Personal Growth
Some books touch on themes that we’re not ready to explore or find personally unsettling. Whether it’s graphic violence, outdated societal norms, or themes that hit too close to home, our DNFs can reflect our personal values and emotional limits.
As we grow, we may develop a stronger sense of what we’re willing to tolerate in literature. Certain books that once felt acceptable may now seem problematic or even offensive.
Example: A book written decades ago may contain sexist or racist stereotypes that were once overlooked but now feel impossible to ignore.
5. The Writing Style or Pacing Isn’t Right
Sometimes, a book simply isn’t engaging enough. Slow pacing, overly descriptive prose, or a lack of character development can all contribute to a reader losing interest. This doesn’t necessarily mean the book is poorly written—it just means it’s not a good match.
Readers often cite pacing as a major factor in deciding whether to continue with a book. Some prefer a slow, immersive experience, while others need a story to move quickly to stay engaged.
Example: A novel with beautifully written but excessively long descriptions may feel tedious if you prefer tight, action-driven narratives.
Why We Should Normalize DNF-ing Books
There is no shame in not finishing a book. In fact, abandoning books can be seen as a sign of a confident reader—one who values their time and understands their own tastes. Here’s why we should embrace the DNF:
- Reading should be enjoyable, not a chore. If a book isn’t bringing you joy, why force it?
- There are too many great books waiting to be discovered. Every unfinished book makes room for one that might become your next favorite.
- It’s a form of self-awareness. Knowing what doesn’t work for you as a reader helps refine your future book choices.
How to Decide When to DNF a Book
If you’re struggling with a book but unsure whether to push through or abandon it, ask yourself:
- Am I enjoying any part of this book?
- Do I care about what happens next?
- Am I reading this out of obligation or genuine interest?
- Would I rather be reading something else?
If the answers lean towards frustration or disengagement, it might be time to move on.
Final Thoughts: Letting Go of Book Guilt
In a world where reading is often seen as an intellectual virtue, there’s a strange pressure to finish every book we start. But reading is personal, and we owe it to ourselves to prioritize what truly enriches our minds and souls. So, let go of the guilt, embrace the DNF, and focus on books that make you excited to turn the page.
Further Reading:
- Why It’s Okay to DNF Books – Book Riot
- The Psychology of DNFing a Book – Medium
So, tell me—what’s a book you’ve abandoned, and why?
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